365 Challenge: Day 60 – Charming

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Charming: pleasant, attractive, polite, friendly, and likable

Ah, my friends… I am the epitome of charming. If you saw me, or knew me, you’d immediately think… he’s my prince riding in on a white horse with an amazing smile, a wonderful sense of humor, beautiful eyes, an exquisitely-tailored suit, bags of money in his saddle, perfectly-coiffed hair, and… oh, wait, wrong blog! Sorry… got confused there for a moment. Thought I was writing a chapter in my fairy tale novel…

What the #$#@@? No… I was not stretching out my ego in that first paragraph, nor was I beginning a post on the non-existence of the quintessential Prince Charming. And I wasn’t about to dive into the tragic sexist interpretations that every girl (or boy) is searching for this perfect man, as some are searching for the perfect woman or whatever tickles their fancy. But in all sincerity… I don’t think I’ve ever heard a woman referred to as “charming” when it comes to romanticism; it seems, at least in my experience, to be a word used to describe a man. Anyone have a good use of when it described a woman in a courtship / romantic sort of notion? I’m curious…

The real intention behind today’s 365 Daily Challenge word is how although I mostly fit the definition, I would not consider myself a charming person. To me… although there always has been a small part of me who (1) kinda am that little boy looking to be rescued, (2) loves all those fairy tale movies and their re-interpretations where Cinderella (or Cinder… fella?) find their perfect partner after dropping a shoe that fits no other, and (3) believes in the magic of changing one’s life at the snap of a wand. To me…

Charming is very difficult to maintain as a characteristic one demonstrates for most of his/her life. Charming is more “point in time” or “momentary” … as in … he was so charming that first night, she was a charming hostess during those first few months (ooh, I came up with an example)! No one can be charming 24/7. We all get irritable. We all are tired. We all are jealous. To truly be charming all your life, you’d have to never exhibit those qualities, which seems quite impossible, or rare, at the very least. Let’s tackle those 5 words:

pleasant – seems a bit weak of a word as part of the way to describe charming. If you are charming, you better be a whole lot more than just pleasant. You better show me something unique, above standards… it should be natural and unknown to you… something almost ethereal where you exude a seductive yet innocent aura

attractive – yes, probably quite necessary, but again… a bit weak. You better be God or Goddess-like if you are the stereotypical Prince or Princess Charming

polite – true, you would have to be kind and nice… but I’d expect full-on royal-treatment and going an extra step to convince me you’re charming

friendly – yes, absolutely, but again, go overboard — make it seem so you are friendly to everyone but with me, you are the very best of intimate attraction

likable – doesn’t this mean the same thing as the above words… yes, I suppose that’s the point in a definition… maybe the Interwebs steered me in the wrong direction with this definition…

OK, so what have I learned here… the definition of the word charming doesn’t quite meet my expectation of the connotation and denotation of the word I imagine it to be. Let’s see how I do/don’t fit into it:

  • I work hard (although it is innate) to disappear into my surroundings and the crowd. I do not want to stand out among others.
  • My humor is an acquired taste, one in which it is a bit offbeat and rare to see.
  • I consider myself the epitome of average; and this pleases me.
  • I get too caught up in what others are thinking, rather than casual enough to just go about myself without a care.

So right out of the gate, I really wouldn’t consider myself charming. I’ve met a few people I considered charming… more of a passing fancy… momentary, as I noted. What about you? An example of a charming man or woman? But let’s be clear — is this is a fictional character or real-life person you’ve met? Inquiring minds would like to know who believes in the word charming… and what your definition would be…

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.


9 thoughts on “365 Challenge: Day 60 – Charming

    Nel said:
    May 11, 2017 at 9:52 AM

    I haven’t met him yet but I think Idris Elba is incredibly charming and perfect ;). I think you’re right in that charming is momentary. I also think its just not a word people go for anymore. It always seems out of place in a sentence or like you’re trying to be super ritzy in some way.

    Liked by 1 person

      James J. Cudney IV responded:
      May 11, 2017 at 1:19 PM

      I need to look him up. I’ve heard of him and seen a few photos; however, I’m unfamiliar with him as a person or his work. And you make total sense about the word not being incorporated anymore these days… ritzy is a good one!

      Liked by 2 people

        Nel said:
        May 11, 2017 at 1:38 PM

        Just watch the show Luther and you will see Idris Elba in all his amazing glory. He also plays the gate person in the Thor movies. Another good post James 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

        readrantrockandroll said:
        May 11, 2017 at 11:00 PM

        I love him. Have you seen him on the show “Fighter” where he boxes? Pretty cool. 😉

        Liked by 2 people

        Nel said:
        May 12, 2017 at 5:26 AM

        I haven’t but I will now! He also has a movie coming out here soon with Matthew McConaughey.

        Liked by 2 people

        James J. Cudney IV responded:
        May 12, 2017 at 6:57 AM

        No…. interesting.


    readrantrockandroll said:
    May 11, 2017 at 11:08 PM

    James, this is such a wonderful post. I’m going to come out and say that I believe my husband is charming and I wish I could be more like him in the likeable and friendly aspect. I do think I’m friendly, but not outgoing like him and this changes that, doesn’t it? It feels like it does. This goes back to the whole extrovert/introvert personality type I think. Hmmm…You really have me thinking tonight… 😉

    Liked by 1 person

      James J. Cudney IV responded:
      May 12, 2017 at 6:59 AM

      I’m glad he’s charming. That’s a good thing. Probably need to be a bit more of an extrovert to be charming, but I suppose at the same time, there is something charming when a person is a little shy and removed, but friendly when you get to know them and see them open up more. So it could be possible.

      Liked by 1 person

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