365 Challenge: Day 83 – Clumsy

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Clumsy: awkward in movement or in handling things, difficult to handle or use; unwieldy

When I began the 365 Daily Challenge… oh, 83 days ago (wow!), I noted it would be about traits I currently embody or would like to embody in the future. Today, I’ve selected a trait that I am not right now, nor would I want to be in the future. Why, you’re undoubtedly asking, [are you boring me] would I choose this one? It’s a pretty common one, and it affects my life a bit more than I realized. You’re in for a bit of a more revealing than usual post, as it’s all on the table now! Hopefully you enjoy my sarcasm and humorous mood today.

I am not clumsy, but my significant other is quite clumsy. I cannot even begin to bitch about explain how many times we have laughed over the messes being made all about the house. A good friend of his once exclaimed “You make some of the biggest messes I’ve ever seen” in a public setting… to which several heads turned… and I in my shyness, I believe, ducked behind a column near the table. Those lines somehow ended up in my book, too. Revenge is sweet — remember that!

An example… when we moved in together about 4 years ago, we consolidated kitchen stuff. Between the two of us, we had about 16 wine glasses. After about 3 months, I noticed we were down to 6. I realized how many had either “disappeared” or been broken either while I was already in bed sleeping, or hidden during the day so I couldn’t find the remaining shards. {Not that I’d be mad… it’s a running funny joke between us). So… that weekend, we went to some department store and bought a box of 24. We arrived home, started unpacking everything else… he took responsibility for the glasses… as I didn’t break them, so I wasn’t cleaning all the new ones. As I’m putting away some groceries.. BANG. BOOM. CRASH.  I meander into the living room… half a box of glasses strewn across the floor. Ryder sitting on the couch looking judgmental… possibly annoyed for being woken up. And the significant other… holding a box upside down… “They were stuck. I was just trying to get them out.”

Unfortunately, in the last few weeks, the tables seem to have turned on me. Last week, I was clearing out the dishwasher, mostly full of wine glasses, water glasses and some plates.  {Aside: Maybe I do drink too much…}  We’d washed the pots by hand. As I pulled out two stemless wine glasses, I knocked one against the top of the counter and cracked it in half. OK… cleaned that one up. I then grabbed the remaining glass, turned around and lifted my arm to place it in the top cabinet on the other side of the room… and misjudged the shelf. Yes, that one cracked, too. OK, twice isn’t so bad in one day, right?

Moving along… last night, we’re at a friend’s 40th birthday dinner at a restaurant our friend picked because of its performance space. Guests are arriving…. he hired a few friends to sing since he’s in the theatre and music business… a few of us are chatting near the entrance. In comes someone I know, who walks towards us. We both lean in to give a quick hug / kiss, and as I pull back, I look at my significant other’s expression… {no, it wasn’t jealousy}… then my eyes cast downward to the front of his shirt… about a third of the Manhattan he was drinking casually rested on his dress shirt, awaiting a tart reply.

I ask: “Did I do that?” {Aside: Not in an Urkel voice, don’t go there please}

The response: “Grumble Grumble… Yes.” {Grumble = inexplicable words I couldn’t understand}

What do I say: “Eh, you had it coming. Not sure why, but I’m sure it was warranted.” {Followed by a very huge smirk!}

And to top it all off… this morning… I got up at 8am — later than normal, but then again, I stayed up past midnight, which is unusual for me. Made coffee. Had 1 successful cup of coffee. He wanders out around 8:45 and sits on the couch, petting Ryder (dog. shiba. almost 10 years old). I stand to get myself more coffee and pour him a cup, too. I bring it back from the kitchen. At that exact moment, Ryder chooses to jump down in front of me, as I lean in to hand over the coffee. I try to stylishly pause, but it was too late. I jerked the cup forward and about 1/2 poured out onto the significant other. {Thankfully on him and not the couch. I didn’t feel like cleaning couch fabric this early in the morning! This is where that revenge part comes into play — turn-about is fair play!}.

I didn’t even respond. I just casually backed away and sat on the other side of the room in the chair and covered my face in a pillow, laughing uncontrollably. So… you see… I am not clumsy. I have never been clumsy. Except for the last few weeks. I don’t understand it. It’s a regularly daily occurrence when it’s his clumsiness. Every meal requires clean-up on the floor (whatever Ryder’s chosen not to eat). I constantly take clothes to the dry cleaner and apply stain remover to the laundry. It’s never been me. Why, oh why, have the Clumsy Gods chosen to reverse this malady of bad fortune onto me?

Are you clumsy? Do you live with someone who is always making messes? And does anyone know a spell to reverse whatever cockamamie (sp?) ridiculous switch-a-roo has befallen me?

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

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26 thoughts on “365 Challenge: Day 83 – Clumsy

    Nel said:
    June 3, 2017 at 10:25 AM

    Hahahaha! I can be very clumsy some days. I think most of the time those days are attributed to not getting enough sleep. I think it’s adorable that you two have this running joke going on between you but maybe it’s time to invest in some stemless, glass-looking, but plastic wineglasses and maybe plastic mugs too 😛

    Liked by 2 people

      James J. Cudney IV responded:
      June 3, 2017 at 10:30 AM

      You are so correct. We’re down to about 8 again so… might be a weekend trip to find em.

      Liked by 1 person

        Nel said:
        June 3, 2017 at 10:31 AM

        My best friend and his husband have the same problem only its with tupperware. They have a whole cabinet of tupperware but can never seem to find a lid to any of them when I come over and raid their pantry for stuff to take to my house, bahahaha.

        Liked by 1 person

        James J. Cudney IV responded:
        June 3, 2017 at 10:34 AM

        That’s very funny too… the covers are probably hidden in your cabinets!!!

        Liked by 1 person

        Nel said:
        June 3, 2017 at 10:39 AM

        LOL I didn’t even think about that! Omg, you’re probably right!

        Liked by 2 people

    susandyer1962 said:
    June 3, 2017 at 10:37 AM

    Hahaha this was too funny of a post!!

    Liked by 1 person

    informalmee said:
    June 3, 2017 at 11:07 AM

    Haha I laughed a lot when reading this! I enjoy your sarcasm!😂

    Liked by 1 person

      James J. Cudney IV responded:
      June 3, 2017 at 11:46 AM

      Thank you! I laughed a little while writing it. Sometimes the truth hurts! 🙂

      Like

    Kristin said:
    June 3, 2017 at 11:15 AM

    I am so clumsy that I fall walking up stairs or smack my head when I get in the car. I replaced all the glass plates in the house with melamine.

    I tore a tendon in my foot last year when I was standing at the stove, cooking. I turned my body to grab a plate and…pop!

    I agree with the suggestion for non breakable wineglasses 😂

    Liked by 1 person

      James J. Cudney IV responded:
      June 3, 2017 at 11:47 AM

      Nel had stood point. As for you… you need to write a book about all these things in your life. Advice and humor and just general daily affirmations!

      Liked by 1 person

        Kristin said:
        June 3, 2017 at 12:06 PM

        Make all the other people like me feel better? I mean, most people tear a tendon doing something cool, like crossfit.

        We can manage it while cooking 😂

        I feel for your SO lol. Please let him know he is not alone!

        I have to chuckle that you’re currently suffering the clumsy curse. Try tapping your heels together three times and give a little spin. Just try not to break something when you do it! 😘

        Thanks for the laughs today!

        Liked by 1 person

        James J. Cudney IV responded:
        June 3, 2017 at 12:23 PM

        Oh very funny. I might transport to Oz that way. So if you don’t see any 365 posts tomorrow, please go in search of a Wizard.

        You are welcome. Thank you too!

        Liked by 1 person

        Kristin said:
        June 3, 2017 at 12:24 PM

        That happens to be one of my favorite movies (and books!) So if no post goes up, I’m definitely coming to look for you!!!

        Liked by 1 person

    cwhiteweb said:
    June 3, 2017 at 1:22 PM

    This is hilarious 😂 😂 😂
    The “you had it coming” with a smirk, ugh, you killed it!! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    therobinsnest2017 said:
    June 3, 2017 at 1:57 PM

    Ha! My poor dogs get the blame for my clumsiness…..

    Liked by 1 person

    Jo-Ann said:
    June 3, 2017 at 4:06 PM

    I was in stitches reading this! LOL Yeah, the wine glasses…they don’t last long around here either 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    Rae Longest said:
    June 7, 2017 at 7:07 PM

    You two are the (I’m)perfect match! If you didn’t love him, you wouldn’t keep him around. I have a cat that routinely knocks things off my nightstand into the trash basket, where it goes missing. Yep, we threw whatever it was out. (I lost a watch, fortunately a Timex) that way. But we love her; after sixteen years and lots of yowling later, I guess we’ll keep her. She is not a graceful cat, but a very clumsy one.

    Liked by 1 person

      James J. Cudney IV responded:
      June 7, 2017 at 8:10 PM

      That poor cat! I wonder if she’s doing it on accident or to get more attention. So sorry about the watch! But she sounds quite lovable.

      Liked by 1 person

    Rae Longest said:
    June 8, 2017 at 12:15 PM

    Sometimes Lena’s lovable, sometimes just exasperating! Many times, she’s leaning over the nightstand with hind feet on the bed, licking the cold condensation off my bottled water. She thinks I put the water bottle there in case she needs a drink during the night and doesn’t want to go to the kitchen or the bathtub where her water bowls (which aren’t nice and cold) are. She is spoil-ed!

    Liked by 1 person

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