Woof: the sound everyone thinks a dog is making, but in reality, people just have no clue
So listen… Jay/James (whatever you humans call him… he’s Dude to me, sometimes Dad if he’s been nice enough) has been looking a little busy lately, and I thought maybe I should help out with this writing thing he keeps talking about. As you can see in my picture above (BTW, aren’t I adorable?), I’ve decided to takeover his 365 Daily Challenge blog on Mondays for the rest of the year. But don’t tell him. That know-it-all thinks he can do everything, but he can’t. I mean I didn’t get my dinner tonight until 8:50 because he was out late with his friends supposedly doing karaoke. And he hates karaoke. I’ve heard him go on and on and on until the cows come home about how he can’t sing. (But seriously, he can’t — if you heard the songs that come out of his throat in the shower, you’d cover your ears too. My paws barely reach, and they don’t make ear plugs in my size. I think it’s prejudice against my species to be honest.)
I guess I can believe it, as he doesn’t usually lie to me. And karaoke is a big Japanese thing. And I’m Japanese. So it’s probably true that he wasn’t out cheating on me. Though I smelled that other dirty dog on his legs. She’s the new girl around the block. Some friend of his who took me running once got a new dog. She calls herself Zora. Trying to tempt my humans to bring home another animal. I don’t think so. This is my house. And if he or the other daddy even think about bringing some mutt into my domain, I’ll just have to teach them a little lesson. Anyways… oh, gotta go. Something is in my bed and shouldn’t be there. They never listen. Another task for tonight. Always working.
<< 5 minute break >>
Grrrr… Woof… Oops, sorry, forget about you. I get distracted. Sometimes I can’t help myself. Like earlier today, I was waiting by my food bowl, which was empty. Did I tell you they don’t feed me enough around this joint? Twice a day. That dude eats a few times a day. Why can’t I? One tiny little bowl of kibble and nothing else? Well, maybe I am exaggerating. He does give me lots of table scraps. I mean a few. Not a lot. More would be better. I’ve learned a new trick this week. Forced to. It’s really rather rude. I mean, like, he makes me lay on my belly and put my head down. Then they say things like “What do we do when we want a snack?” What am I, one of those lazy cats? I’m a regal shiba. I don’t do tricks. People do tricks to impress me. Wait… I think I got off topic again. Where was I?
That damn hedgehog! There’s a whole family of those disgusting vile creatures who live here with me. I’ve caught three already. One hangs out around the corner under the couch. I put a picture here to show you the one who tries to take my spot in the bed. I taught him. He’s currently stuffed in the toy box at the bottom underneath the rest of the creatures that I turn into toys whenever they try to attack me. Like that monkey. Dudes! Or Dudettes, as I believe some women might be reading this blog too… Did you ever have a monkey on your back? One that just wouldn’t take no for an answer. I do. Look at him:
That’s what happens here when you don’t act fast. Animals takeover. And if you say one thing about me taking over this 365 thing, I’ll lick you until you cry from laughing so hard. And I’m good it. I lick things all day long. Like the floor. It tastes good. Except on the days he cleans. Which in my opinion is not very often. Sometimes I’m eating crumbs from the prior week. That’s pretty bad. Well, I might have sneaked them to my secret hiding place, so it’s not really his fault. But when you don’t get enough food to eat, you have to do something to survive. Did I tell you about his nasty habit? He keeps food locked away in the refrigerator. And then in the garbage pail under the sink. Does he really think I don’t know about it? And if I know about it, what’s the point of hiding it? Dude’s whacked. He needs to chill sometimes. Like tonight, when he got home. He had a second piece of cake from that refrigerator. And I only got to lick the plate. Three measly pieces of coconut shavings, a little bit of icing and like two strawberry crumb droppings not even worth sharing with that monkey. And before you ask, I did dump the monkey in the bottom of the toy bucket. Maybe Monkey and Hedgehog will learn to take me seriously some day. When I say I mean business, I mean business.
<< 20 minute break >>
This writing stuff is hard work. And this keyboard is too big for my paws. I can’t reach from left to right. So I get up and walk back and forth. Sometimes I feel the need to scratch my butt on the carpet. Jay doesn’t like when I do that. But if he’d take me the groomers a little more often, maybe I wouldn’t have to. So until he does, the carpet is my personal butt scratcher. Oh! Bird at the window. Stupid things land on my Enchanted Garden all the time. That’s the NYC Terrace for all you readers… Jay and W use the wrong name all the time. I ate a few of those birds. They call me Ryder the Cat-Like Dog. I have my own FaceBook page. Want to see?
I’m a little tired. The bunny wore me out. Sometimes he is a pain in the ass too. Hops around like he owns the joint. It’s my place, Bunny. And don’t say otherwise or I’ll tare you to pieces. I already ripped your stuffing out and you are nothing but a dirty old grey rabbit on his last legs. But I’ll still sleep with you. I’m generous. Well… it’s bed time. I hope this is the type of post you people expect. It’s my first one and I will be more organized in the future. But if not, then go find another blog to read until it’s Tuesday. Cause I own Mondays now. And if you have any special requests, let me know. As you can see, I like to entertain. Gotta go. Time to check the food dish again. After a nice long scratch. And a lick. I see something moving by the door to the terrace. It looks like it’s trying to escape. But nothing escapes from me. I’m King Ryder.
Wait… this is supposed to be about Jay and the word of the day. Which for today is woof. Hmmm… how does this relate to him? He’s already sleeping, who cares tonight?
- Today’s 365 Daily Challenge recommended blogger to know is Didi Oviatt. Today’s another one of those days where there isn’t really a connection between the Word of the Day and the Blogger of the Day, except maybe that today’s post is being written by a different writer/Ryder, and my blogger to know is a writer! Didi and I connected about two months ago via our WordPress blogs, as she’s both a reader and a writer like me, as well as master of inspirational ideas and posts. She has been nominated for a few blogging awards and participated in several tags over the last few months. I always enjoy reading her posts and learning about her upcoming novels and marketing plans. She was very helpful when I had some questions about being a new author and signing with agents and/or publishers. But beyond that, she’s absolutely sweet and friendly, making it easy to connect with and share a few laughs. She’s also published several books, which you can purchase and/or read (more info on her website). We chatted about each of them and she’s recommended the one I should read, which I’ll be purchasing in my next book haul this summer. I’d suggest poking around her site a bit, learning more about the stories she writes and her life growing up in a small town. You’ll find something humorous and touching, as well as maybe find a new favorite book. If you don’t believe me, check out the below blurb from her About Me section and then go visit the site yourself:
- “Growing up in a small town had more than several advantages and disadvantages. Saying that my childhood was sheltered is nothing short of an understatement. Unlocked doors, cleared streets, and the quiet of a trustworthy neighborhood were all welcomed features of my hometown. As a small child I baked cookies with the old lady down the road. I sat next to my kindergarten crush in sun day school, and literally rode my bike in the middle of the road without a care in the world. We didn’t have what kids have today. We actually had to use our imaginations to have a good time. There were no smart phones, tablets, or 64s to keep us occupied. We were perfectly content to play with our stick guns and a water hose for hours on end… And I loved it! Along with my scrapes and bruises I also maintained a simple, happy for the little things attitude, and of course a great tan.”
About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”
I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.
The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.
Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.