365 – June Posts

365 Challenge: Day 103 – Tolerant

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Tolerant: showing willingness to allow the existence of opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with

tolerant

I do not like the word tolerant. It is clinical. Institutional. Incendiary. It annoys me to accept we need to have a word like tolerant in order to do what should just be the innate and natural thing we all want to do. To have to tell someone or teach someone to be tolerant [of differences] is just an unacceptable truth, as well as one of the areas of life that truly frustrates me. Not because I don’t believe in it, but because there are people in this world who think they are so perfect that any difference is wrong — and that it has become our responsibility to have to educate them to be tolerant.

No, I’m not going to rant on about injustice or inequality. I’m simply making a small statement that while being tolerant is absolutely the right thing to do, it concerns me that we need a word for doing the right thing. I’m not an activist. I am not political. I don’t push my beliefs and thoughts on other people. I just live and breathe each day in the way in which I feel is proper and fair. I’m sure you’ve previously noticed this approach of mine when I’ve posted about being non-judgmental or open-minded. But today, I felt the need to use the word tolerant, as that was the concept being thrown around last night at an event I attended.

A very good friend of mine invited me to the NYC Mayor’s PRIDE month reception at Gracie Mansion last evening. My partner and I eagerly accepted the invitation and explored the wonderful grounds and buildings where our mayor lives. Both the mayor and his wife spoke about how amazing NYC is when it comes to being tolerant and accepting of people’s differences. And then they invited a special guest to the stage: Laverne Cox. For those who don’t know who Laverne is, you can find out more here. As a quick intro, she’s a transgender pioneer who moved from Alabama to NYC where she was able to become who she was inside, as well as a star on the TV show “Orange is the New Black.” She’s also the first Black Transgender Woman to appear on the cover of TIME Magazine. Enough Said.

As I wandered around the party last night, then chatted with friends at dinner, and ultimately when I woke up this morning, this concept of being tolerant has been front and center on my mind. I am not a religious person, but I was raised Catholic and went to church for nearly twenty years. I have little desire (other than to correct wrongs) to get involved in heated political discussions or banter over what’s right and what’s wrong. To me, there’s a simple fact when it comes to… ugh… hate saying it this way… being tolerant of others:

“Your life is none of my business. If you are not hurting me or someone else, you are free to do whatever you want.”

It’s simple. It’s direct. It’s not about religion or hate. It simply means… embrace who you are, do what you want to do and don’t harm others. For anyone to have the audacity to claim otherwise is selfish and uneducated. And to think you can tell someone else what is right or wrong makes no sense. None of us created the concept of life. None of us have the answers or explanations. None of us are inside someone else’s head. We have absolutely no idea what makes another person who they are. Yes, we have science and history and analysis. I believe in all of it. But I also believe that there is something unique to each of us, and that tiny little thing is enough to tell me that I cannot judge another person when I am not that person. What’s right for you is what’s right for you.

We each have our life and own responsibilities and should focus on those things — not whether someone feels more like a man or a woman, or both… loves a man or a woman, or both… wants to change their gender… is more attracted to a certain look about someone else… feels more comfortable using a specific restroom… If I’m gonna use the bathroom… seriously… I’m going in there for ONE PURPOSE… to get it over and done with as quickly as possible… not to engage with anyone else while in there… I will wash my hands and leave… and then it’s out of my mind. I don’t care who else is in there with me. That’s certainly not my first priority. And why would it be anyone else’s?

I really am not ranting. I’m attempting to just be honest and funny. And I’m fairly certain 99% of the people reading this post, i.e. following me, you probably feel the same way. And if you don’t, and I’ve offended you, I certainly didn’t intend to and I accept any consequences. All I can say is that I tolerate your inability to be a more open-minded person and wish you well in your own journey. But for those of us who read this, believe this or preach this… being tolerant, that is, I’m glad to be part of your life.

And so… Happy PRIDE. Happy June. Happy Friday. Happy Everything… because we have one single life that we know of… and I’m not gonna spend it worrying about what other people think or do with their own life. I’ve got better things to do… like read and blog. And make a fool of myself in this 365 Daily Challenge — among other things! Unplanned RANT done. Back to reality. Ah…

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

365 Challenge: Day 102 – Independent

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Independent: free from outside control; not relying on another’s authority, livelihood or sustenance

indepdent.png

What a word! It’s often what people struggle and strive for. It’s used as a way to chastise someone if they are exceeding in their individualistic behaviors. It’s in a popular song. It’s part of war. It’s types of booksellers and publishers. It can be lonely. It can be a treasure you hold on to. It is something very different for each one of us.

I consider myself independent. I began working at 13, delivering newspapers. At 14 and 15, I worked in a bowling alley, teaching children to bowl and running the front desk. At 16 and 17, I was a grocery store cashier and stock boy. When I went away to college, my parents and I split the costs after any scholarships I’d received. For my part, I took out student loans and I worked on campus in the Education and English Department offices. And during summers, I waited tables and worked at a day care nursery managing a classroom full of 2-year-olds. It was instilled in me at a young age to work hard for what you want and to never rely on someone else to handle something that was your responsibility.

And I firmly believe in it now. To me, other people lending a hand is an additional layer of support, an extra of sorts, beyond what you should bake into your initial plan. It’s something you may need on occasion, and you should ask for the help when you truly need it, but don’t assume that is part of the solution for whatever it is you are trying to accomplish. This could be money, emotional support, a place to live, medical care, or anything else that requires assistance. Like most things I say or believe, apply the 80/20 rule, as it’s not a one-size-fits-all for every circumstance belief and approach. But as a general guideline in life, being independent is important to me and I recommend it to anyone else, at least wherever you can make it happen.

Independence is about freedom. Freedom to choose your own path, actions and destiny. Sometimes it is easy, but not always. Money is not always available even to begin working on a path that you want to take. Illness sits in the way from being able to choose what you want. Family obligations may be more important. But when you have the opportunity, leaning towards independence helps you become stronger and motivated. Make small changes. Start in tiny ways. See how it makes you feel. It can be scary. It can be fun. It can be rewarding. You’ll never know until you give it a chance.

I’m not independent in every aspect of my life. I’ve chosen to be in a committed, long-term partnership. I want to be with another person in my life journey. But I also recognize we’re not attached at the hip nor are we a single entity. We’ve made decisions about how to manage finances together, to co-own and care for a home, to raise a dog together, but at the end of the day, we are also separate people with individualistic needs and desires. Hopefully they always align and we work on them as we gracefully age together.

I think I’m the teddy bear in that situation!

I’ve noticed my attitude has changed over the years on some of these topics. And I pay close attention to the words my friends and acquaintances choose. For instance… when you invite a friend over or ask what (s)he did for the weekend, do they say “we” or “I?” Some people immediately refer to themselves as a couple. “We had friends over for dinner.” “We built a garden.” Others remain singular or separate. “Oh, I read a book. John/Jane went to the movies.” I’m not a psychologist nor have I studied these things, but I’m curious what that says about a person’s independence.

For as much as I claim to be independent, I almost always choose the “we,” assuming the person knows I am sharing a life with someone else. If it’s a complete stranger, sure, I’d probably just refer to myself as it would sound odd saying “we.” My mindset is independent on some things but dependent on others. We’ve made an agreement to split everything 50/50 in our household / life. So making decisions is sometimes a lengthy process. If one person wants to spend more money, we have to work through that conversation together, or accept the other person chooses to pay more because it’s more important to them. Given my other half has little interest/time in reading (he reads legal briefs all day at work), we tend to “go our separate ways” around 10pm. He watches TV in the living room for an hour, while I go to bed to read for an hour. Then he comes in when his show is over.

With friends, I am also very independent. I don’t ask for anything other than friendship. Sometimes I’ll complain a little bit and we end up talking through an issue, but I rarely pick up the phone and say “Hey, I need some advice, or I’m a bit down, can we do something?” I’m not saying this is the right or wrong way to be, by the way… it’s just how I am. I keep things to myself. I have something in my head that pushes me to be independent, rather than reach out to other people for help. If it were urgent, I’m sure I would ask for the help. But it’s not a natural reaction or notion for me. I try to do everything I can for myself, and then when I can’t, I will turn to someone else. Inclusive of big things and little things. When I bought new cars in the past, I didn’t ask for help until the very last moment. I did all the research, chose what I wanted and looked around. On each final trip, I asked my father to go with me for his input and then I closed. If I’m cooking, and I’m not sure what to do with a step in a recipe, I’ll wing it. Sometimes I’ll call my mom and get advice, but usually not. If we’re cooking together, yes — definitely work together on it.

So as I think about who I am… I’m pretty independent. I know I used to be co-dependent in relationships, but that’s a different story. I was young and immature. I’m much more open-minded these days. How about you? Do you define yourselves as dependent or independent? Not so much how you are in a relationship with your spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend, but generally in your approach with other people. Do you keep your distance, reach out for support or somewhere in between? There’s no right or wrong answer. We’re all shown a different way and then choose our own paths. Sometimes the answer is both– as it’s important to lean different ways, given the situation at hand. But like the 80/20 rule, I’d say I’m probably 80% independent and 20% dependent across the board.

Cause it’s scary inside my head! LOL

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

365 Challenge: Day 101 – Sullen

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Sullen: bad-tempered and sulky; gloomy; depressed

sullen

“I did not get the job.” Most of us have said that before, and if you haven’t, it’ll happen one day. It’s rare to always get the things you want, especially when it comes to big things like an apartment, a house, a date, or a job. And when that happens, you probably get a little upset or depressed. That’s how I felt yesterday afternoon and was hoping it would dissipate by the time I woke up this morning. But it didn’t, and I was feeling a tad sullen as I arose from bed.

A bit of backstory to set the stage for those who don’t yet know me all that well. When I graduated from college, just as the country was preparing for Y2K, I had an English degree with minors in communication, Spanish, education and business. I wasn’t certain what to do with my career, but I wanted to be a writer during some part of it. The weekend I drove home after graduation, I faxed my resume to a bunch of jobs and was called immediately to come in for an interview as a project administrator and technical writer at a local company in my hometown.  Seventeen years later, I had parlayed that initial position into 6 or 7 promotions, culminating in the SVP of Technology role in one of the sister companies, owned by the same family. For a variety of reasons, not necessary to go into here, I left that company and role last year.

I was going to take some time off, finally do some writing and decide what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. In that time, I wrote a book and it’s been well received by some friends, family and beta readers I met via the Internet. I created a bunch of websites and blogs, connecting with thousands of people. I’ve read hundreds of books and drafted 500 book reviews. I’ve gotten a break from the insanity of the corporate technology life I was leading, where I worked 80 hours a week and could never put my phone down or ignore my email. I felt really proud and accomplished for all that I’d achieved since leaving my position to focus on the things I’d always enjoyed but never had time for.

The Christmas holidays came and left, and I started to get a bit bored. I began searching for a literary agent to help find a publisher for the book. I started looking for a job again, for a variety of reasons. Boredom. Money. Keep up the skills. Money. Connections. Money. By February, I had the resume in a good place. I started networking a little more. And I went on a few interviews. None of the jobs felt right, but it was important to practice the interview skills and to be open-minded. Nearly 4 months later, I’m still searching. I had a really strong series of interviews in the last month and I know it had come down to me and another person. A call was setup for yesterday to discuss next steps. I wasn’t feeling strong about it, as something told me this was a great job but I wasn’t going to be selected. Took the call late yesterday afternoon. “I did not get the job.”

Sullen. A bit sad. Tired. Depressed. Concerned. Scared. Lots of emotions and thoughts rolling around in the old cage at the top of my head. First, to set expectations: I’m totally fine. I’ve been told “no” before, and I’ve been told “yes” before. This isn’t about money. I’m not worried that I’ll never find work again. I don’t take it personally. I’m not looking for someone to help or even tell me it’ll be OK. Today’s post isn’t really about me feeling sad or depressed as much as it is a voluntary acknowledgement that my mood was affected by the call not because I didn’t get the job, but because it made me feel like I haven’t progressed as much as I would have liked in the last 11 months since leaving my former position.

And as I come upon the one year mark next month, I’m reflecting on what I’ve learned. I started the 365 Daily Challenge to push myself to be honest and truly analyze everything going on in my life. I wanted to be more open and connect with people around the world. I needed input on how everyone else made decisions in their lives in the hopes it would trigger a moment where I would figure out my own. I am a very happy person. I am very lucky. I have a wonderful and supportive partner. I am healthy. I have friends and family. I have a good outlook on all these things going on. But today I felt sullen over the call… sullen because after almost one year, I’m still unsure what’s next.

Do I continue looking for corporate positions where the money is good and I have a very structured life? Do I stay on a path for another year with writing and take short-term jobs to pay the bills? Do I truly try to break into a different career where I love my job and have passion all day? Where’s this 365 Daily Challenge going? I actually feel that maybe I do have something of value to say to my friends and acquaintances who read my posts. I’ve been so happy writing the book reviews and reading, maybe that’s where my heart is for the future.

Most of all, I am grateful that I have all these positive things going on in my life. It’s rare that people have this opportunity to step away from reality and give an alternate life a chance. And that’s why I am keeping my minor frustration, depression or disappointment in check. But I’m still human… so today I am sullen. Tomorrow it will get better. And well… that’s good enough for me. Sorry for the dull and possibly depressing post today. But you’ll always find the truth on ThisIsMyTruthNow.

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

365 Challenge: Day 100 – Morbid

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Morbid: characterized by or appealing to an abnormal and unhealthy interest in disturbing and unpleasant subjects, especially death and disease.

morbid

Today, we are celebrating life and death on ThisIsMyTruthNow’s 365 Daily Challenge. And before you go any further, I mean no offense nor to cause any trouble with this post, as it’s intended with humor and jest; however, I acknowledge it also reveals a little bit about my sense of humor. This is going to be an interesting one, but I promise no GIFs with gore, although I do love them.

This is my 100th post in the 365 Daily Challenge. I thought about the number 100 for a few minutes, discovering what it really means to me:

  1. The perfectionist in me always strives to get a score of 100 on any tests or exams (assuming that’s the highest mark). What a nerd!
  2. I’m very in tune with history, time and genealogy, which makes the concept of 100 years, or a century, very important to my research and interests.
  3. I’d like to live until I’m at least 100 years old. I plan to be healthy, active, youthful and still have all my wits about me. The way I look at it… as a kid, I always acted at least 5 to 10 years older than I was, and that continued up until I was around 30 when acting like I was near retirement… I finally gave up and said… act your age. So now… as I start growing older, it’s time to regress a little. By that logic, when I’m 100, maybe it’ll be like I’m really 50. So this is all gonna work out quite well for me. Hope to see you all then, too!

To put a few points around these rambles… hitting the milestone 100 posts in the 365 Daily Challenge today made me feel kinda good. I will also have completed 500 book reviews by next week, which has been a lot of work. And I just made 600 followers on WordPress. A nice little celebration this week… Life on WordPress has been great!

So now you’re asking why is the title of this post “morbid?” Well… I have a slight fascination with death and horror. And life and death balance each other out… so I thought I’d combine the two into this 100th post. A bit morbid, right? Ever since I was a young kid, I’ve always wondered about death — in a very healthy way. Big curiosity over what happens when someone dies, where they really go, do you get a second chance, are there really past lives, can you haunt someone? That kinda stuff. And whenever there’s a book, film or TV show that covers these topics, I love it!

My favorite place to go by myself is a cemetery or a graveyard. I find them relaxing. I feel connected with things. To see all the history. The memories. The missing pieces. The lost. The pain. The hope. Sometimes a little scare or fear at night. It’s a place that feels real to me, which is quite odd, given that it’s the place things that are no longer “real” go after life. I’m odd. I know it. I accept it. But it’s the truth. And that’s what I say on this site.

I also love gore. When movies or films get right in there and show all the horrible, nasty and disgusting things happening to bodies or people who’ve been murdered, it keeps my attention. For almost everyone I know, they close their eyes or leave the room; some even get sick. Not me. I’m good with seeing it all. I have some strange ability to turn off the “scary & squeamish” part and look at it more subjectively. That said… I’ve never been injured myself, so I have no idea what might happen if it were my own body with the issues. I know I get this from my dad, as he’s the same way. Blood, gore, surgery… none of it bothers him. Apparently, we’ve got strong stomachs for that kinda stuff. The only way to describe it is “morbid.”

When I read books like Paradise Lost or Inferno (Dante), I wish I could be part of that exploration. It’s not that I want to see the pain in or on other people, but it’s to gain knowledge about the broad concepts of life and death. It’s more intellectual for me… not like I want to sit around and watch people be dismembered just for fun. OK, well that’s not true… I do love serial killer books and movies, especially when they come from nowhere and make me jump just a little. I root for the serial killer. In theory. Not in real life, of course. That would be wrong. I know that much. 😛

By now, you probably agree… I’m morbid. You may even think I’m quite peculiar and extraordinarily scary. But… as you know… I don’t hold back in these 365 daily posts. So no need to worry whether I’m a secret psycho. A psycho wouldn’t put all this out for the public to read. And it’s a good thing this stuff all makes me laugh and have fun. I could be morose about it; and most people think of morbid and morose together. I’m the opposite. I see morbid as a fascination and morose as doom-n-gloom. Aren’t you glad you read today’s post?

Who would have thought combining the 100th “365 Daily Challenge” post would lead to me talking about serial killers, whacking people’s heads off and wondering when I might die!?!?!! Anyone else out there like me? Or do you run for the hills when it comes to this kinda stuff?

To Be or Not To Be: That Is The Question

(morbid, that is… to be or not to be morbid?)

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

365 Challenge: Day 99 – Social

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Social: (a) relating to society or its organization, as in being friendly and engaging with others, or (b) using technology to stay connected with others

social.jpg

As I awoke this morning, I reached for my phone and looked to see if I’d missed anything overnight. Apart from the normal news, nothing too big happened, except I had over 200 notifications waiting for my review. I thought to myself… so many red dots in the corner of each app on my phone… how will I ever keep up when I am working more frequently and have more people I connect with. Yikes!

Stepping up to the podium, my eyes look down… my expression a bit sullen. “My name is Jay, and I have an issue with the little red dots in the upper right corner on my phone. It calls to me. It mocks me. It makes me think I am slow and unable to keep up. I think I’m growing obsessed with staying on top of social media and I need help.”

Anyone else get a tad bit of anxiety when they have notifications or messages to read or follow up on?

The solution is probably to condense the number of apps I use. To set specific times when I let myself read, review and comment. To relax if it takes a day to respond to someone. So… my post today is going to list all the social media accounts I use and see what others are doing. I’m curious how you all handle it:

  • Which social media apps do you use?
  • Do you interface from one to another or post separately?
  • Do you read every post from every follower or just randomly go thru when you have time?
  • Do you comment on everything?
  • Do you respond when someone writes to you?
  • Do you have “no social media time” rules in place?

 

OK… where is Jay… and why?

 

  • Goodreads: My favorite site… where I list all the books I’ve read, want to read and am currently reading. I’ve created ~500 reviews for books I’ve previously read (99% caught up finally!) and write new ones the day I finish the book. I look for new books, groups and great people to connect with. I am always on here.

 

  • Facebook: It was the first site I joined nearly 8 years ago, but I was one of the last of my friends to finally give it a chance. I’ve added all my former high school and college friends, then removed anyone I didn’t speak with regularly, then added some people back. I can’t decide what I want to do with this site. It’s now a way to see what’s going on in friend’s and family’s lives when we don’t get to connect that often. But sometimes I post book reviews in groups I’ve joined. I’ve created a basic author page, but I rarely post because I haven’t yet published my first book.

 

  • Instagram: I post 1 or 2 pictures a week, generally of food I’ve cooked or baked, the apartment, the terrace or Ryder. I’m not a good photographer and don’t have any editing software, so I’m fairly basic here. I’d like to try to do more with it, but it doesn’t occur to me to take a photo of a book and post it. I’m not creative in that way.

 

  • Pinterest: I’m all over the place on here… I snapshot all my book reviews and setup a collection to highlight them all. I also have clothing, foods, desserts, houses, places, people, books… so many collections of things I love. But my usage is random. I’ll go weeks without looking for anything new, then spend days on it. But if you look through all my collections, you will clearly see who I am and the things I love.

 

  • Twitter: I rarely use Twitter other than to share my book reviews, which I do from the WordPress site. I only go on to check when someone has messaged me. It’s not that easy of a tool to use, plus so many people follow for follows, I don’t have a clean list of people’s accounts I’d actually want to read and follow!

 

  • Google+: I interface book reviews and the 365 Daily Challenge. But I never just go on to search it. Anyone else use it? Find anything new or good?

 

  • Tumblr:  I interface book reviews and the 365 Daily Challenge. But I never just go on to search it. Anyone else use it? Find anything new or good?

 

  • LinkedIn: I created a huge account on here a few years ago for my professional life as a technology executive. I have nearly 3K connections and go on almost every day to see people’s job changes, anniversaries or birthdays. I send a message anytime something changes to keep up our connections. But I don’t look for articles that often anymore since I haven’t been working this year. I need to get back to it, but there’s nothing on here about my writing or reading life.

 

  • Professional Site: I have 2 other websites besides ThisIsMyTruthNow. This is my professional one as a technology executive. I need to keep it up more updated once I get back to work.

 

  • Book Site: I have 2 other websites besides ThisIsMyTruthNow. This one is dedicated to my book, “Watching a Glass Shatter,” as I search for a literary agent or decide to self-publish. I’d love to get feedback on here from everyone.

 

Above and beyond, I have an account on WhatsApp, SnapChat, FourSquare, Ancestry, LINE, OpenTable, Seamless, NetGalley… and it goes on and on! My intention by creating all of these accounts was to be able to connect with and be available across all platforms as: (1) book reviewer, (2) writer and (3) thinker / musings / 365 Challenge dialogue… perhaps find a voice that leads me into my future role and career. Have I over-extended or is everything in the right place…  lots to think about! OK… hit me with it… what do you think is wrong or right, good or bad, useful or silly?

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

365 Challenge: Day 98 – Purple (Color)

Posted on Updated on

Purple: of a color intermediate between red and blue

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Sunday posts, the end of each week, have become a theme on This-Is-My-Truth-Now, organized by groups of five (5). In the first set of five, we explored my primary ethnicity groups and nationalities. In the second set of five, we had the AtoZ Challenges for various favorite things in our lives. And so… I’m continuing the trend of the seventh day, ending the week on Sunday, as a list (we know I love them) that provides more in depth knowledge about me. Only this time, I’m going with colors that are important to who we are. For these five Sundays, I will select a color that has some significance to my life and explore it in my post. I am ignoring black and white, as those are both obvious and also not considered colors by some!

purple

 

Color: Purple. I love this color, but it has no place in my wardrobe except for a couple of dress shirts and ties. Otherwise, I don’t any purple shorts, pants, shoes, socks, underwear, or shirts. For a color I seem to prefer, I wonder why? Too flashy? Too feminine? I’m not sure, but I think that’s a summer goal: to introduce more purple into my wardrobe. So if I don’t often wear it, why is it so important to me? Well, it surround me so often between the foods I eat and the flowers I grow. It makes me smile. I feel happy. It’s the color of royalty. It can stand out or it can blend in.

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It seems to be such a non-basic color that it’s powerful when introduced in the right setting. And so while I have very little of it, perhaps I reserve it for true important circumstances. If I’m playing a board game, and there is a purple piece, I always go for it. When I plant flowers, I tend to look first for purple colors. Of all the flavors besides chocolate in candy or drinks, I go toward grape and purple-colored items. Taffy. Soda. Pop Tarts. Kool-Aid. Jelly. It’s amazing what this seemingly non-natural color shows up in all across the board.

Let’s chat about famous examples of the color purple… And yes, there are probably more, but these are the ones that come to mind or I have familiarity with:

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  • Purple People Eater (what a song!)
  • Purple Nurple (love saying this, but how many people know what it is???)
  • Harold’s Purple Crayon
  • Barney
  • The Color Purple
  • So many flowers, fruits and vegetables
    • plum
    • eggplant (nasty!)
    • figs
    • lilac
    • heather
    • lavender
    • potatoes
    • kohlrabi
    • cabbage
    • peppers
  • Willy Wonka
  • Grape(s)
  • Ursula the Sea Witch
  • Cheshire Cat
  • Color of a bruise
  • Dino from the Flintstones
  • Maleficent
  • The Joker
  • African Violets
  • ROY G. BIV (Violet = Purple)
  • Purple Rain

 

It’s also the color of Easter. Some may argue that pink might be more appropriate, but I lean towards purple, especially when you think about the colors of lent. I believe purple is one of them for us Catholics. Think about the Easter egg dyes… always some share of purple shows up. And the grass in baskets. The wrappers on the candy. Almost like a renewal or new beginning. It’s a theme!

From a quick InterWebs search, descriptions of the color: “Purple is associated spirituality, the sacred, higher self, passion, third eye, fulfillment, and vitality. Purple helps align oneself with the whole of the universe. Different shades, tints, and hues of purple have different meanings. Light purple hues represent feminine energy and delicacy, as well as romantic and nostalgic feelings. Dark purple hues evoke feelings of gloom, sadness, and frustration. Bright purple hues suggest riches and royalty.”

You can read more at: http://www.bourncreative.com/meaning-of-the-color-purple/

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How do you feel about the color purple? Did I miss any famous “purple” things or phrases and names with the word “purple” in them? Do share…

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

365 Challenge: Day 97 – Far-Away

Posted on

Far-Away: distant from others, as in space or time

In yesterday’s 365 Daily Challenge, there were two definitions for the word distant, but I only covered the first one, meaning reserved or cool; not intimate. Today, we shall explore what I intended in the second meaning of “distant,” relative to being far away from our family and friends, due to either distance or time.

far awy

Life is full of change. People come in and out at different points, usually depending on the circumstances surrounding both of your lives. There’s an old expression that says something along the lines of “You can’t change your family. They’re blood relations.” While we could play word games all day and explore family by marriage or adoption, I’m not looking to find all the hidden meanings in these words. But what I do want to discuss is how important a role family plays in your life. A little background:

As I’ve posted before, I am an only-child, but both of my parents have a bunch of siblings who all grew up on Long Island. I have around 15 first cousins whom I essentially grew up with, each living somewhere between 2 minutes and 20 minutes away from me. Perhaps a story for another day, but I wasn’t aware of 2 of the cousins until my grandfather passed away when I was in high school. I met them for the first time at his funeral, not ever knowing they lived in the same town and I went to high school with one of them. {Aside: Not for nothing, but what if I ended up dating one of them without our families knowing… how crazy would that be!} Nonetheless, apart from that one set of relatives, I saw my family nearly every weekend.

We’d have dinners during the week, holiday parties, summer barbecues, impromptu visits and regular play dates. We were all very close, as my parents were close with their siblings for most of their lives. Over the years, for various circumstances, the family has grown further apart. One aunt passed away, but we still see my uncle and cousins. They are the only ones to remain on Long Island with one other exception. The rest have all moved away to Florida or Pennsylvania. My generation, all the cousins, have scattered even further. We’ve moved to the west coast, all over the country and even to Asia and Eastern Europe. Scattered. The family has scattered. Throughout those years, I’ve been both close and distant with each of my cousins, sometimes dependent on our ages and at others where we lived.

You’re thinking… Captain Obvious again, Jay. Sometimes we’re close, sometimes we’re not. True. But my question is… when it’s family, should we make more of an effort? I love them all. I like them all. Some I probably wouldn’t be friends with if they weren’t relatives. Some I probably would be close with even if we weren’t related. As the 15 of us are now all between 25 and 43, we are the generation having children and beginning to think about the future of our family. We try to keep up with texting and social media, sometimes calls and the occasional visit or get-together. But it’s nothing like we did as children with our parents and grandparents. In one way, it’s sad. In another, it’s an exciting challenge, meaning, as we each see the world, we can grow and expand the knowledge of our family.

But are the days of the close-knit family essentially gone? Is this circumstantial to just my family (and people like us)? Is it due to most of us wanting to get off of Long Island? {Aside: It’s a beautiful place, but very congested and hard to travel anywhere. Minimum 2 hours to get outside of the island and beyond NYC, which makes weekend trips a bit difficult} Is it generational with those of us born from 1975 through current days? Or is it that we are too selfish to purposely keep the family connections intact and intimate?

For me, it’s a bit of a pattern. I had a group of grammar school friends, but I don’t see them anymore. We’ll occasionally exchange a message on Facebook or Instagram, but it’s rare — even with my best friend who lived next door. We spent every day together for 18 years, then every summer together during college years. But nearly 20 years later, it’s quite different. Same with my high school and college friends. We grow further and further apart. I’ve got a small group of close friends that my partner and I see frequently, and there is a lot of substance there, but none have known me for decades like some of my former oldest friends… or my family.

Is this how life is, e.g. transient in the sense you pick up and move, find new friends and go on? Technology makes it easier and harder to stay connected. When you have a smart phone, you can see what everyone is doing. Yet at the same time, you’re less inclined to physically get together. While I’m not upset or depressed by everything I’ve just said, I am curious how this plays out for the next 40 years of my life (or more… since I might just live forever). If my partner and I move outside of NY, will we need to start over and find new friends to regularly see in person? Will I grow further apart from family? We don’t have children now, and probably won’t in the future (never really finished that conversation), what happens to us when we’re in our 60s and 70s… are we the great uncles to our cousins and his siblings kids that randomly visit from time to time?

I’m just thinking aloud. I’m a very happy person, so these are just questions that I ponder. How about you? What relationships do you have with your family today? And how do you see that changing in your future? And your friends? Let’s be honest… we say we will stay connected forever… and at 20, I believed it. At 40, I see reality. Or is it just my perception? Let’s get to the root of this… I look forward to hearing from everyone.

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.