fear

365 Challenge: Day 331 – Launch (LIST: Favorite 365 Moments)

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Launch: the start or opening of something (important)

1st Sunday list of 5 favorite moments

Sundays are LIST days and today is no different. Since the next group of five Sundays is the final group and the conclusion of the 365 Daily Challenge, I decided to select my five favorite moments throughout the last year of this challenge. This is our first week and I’ve gone with launch because that’s when it all began… when I found my personal style and voice — a combination of sarcastic humor, blunt truth, hopeful inspiration and artistic license. Let’s go back to the very beginning…

When I began this challenge, I intended to pick an adjective that clearly described who I am. There couldn’t be any more true than the word punctual. When I re-read the original post this morning, I laughed over the creation of a 2-week itinerary for an Italy trip, as I am actually in the process this week of re-booking the updated trip to final get there in May. I flipped through the first few weeks of posts and chose this one because it was the day I discovered the use of the GIF as part of my posting style — hence the word launch. I inserted a bunch of clips that made me laugh and that I thought would be a connection with others. I’ve since cut back on the use of them, but it was heavy in the beginning. I’d take 30 minutes to find them, then 30 minute to format and write about them… which meant I spent too much time on the challenge and couldn’t be punctual with everything else I wanted to accomplish. Ha!

Hope you enjoy this flashback series for the next 5 Sundays… the best part was seeing I had 5 LIKES on this post from March 28, 2017! Thanks everyone for helping me figure out my posting style throughout the last year. I can’t wait to launch the next big thing coming up on my blog in March. I’m pulling it together and will announce a little bit each day during the final March week. Let the excitement launch…

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365 Challenge: Day 16 – Punctual

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Punctual: happening or doing something at the agreed or proper time; on time

You’re all in for a treat today… well, that may be overselling things. I’ve discovered and decided to add animated graphics and GIFs to my posts. I searched for a few fun ones this morning and will drop ’em in throughout today’s topic. And since I am a voracious reader as you recently learned, and well, this picture is just great, the first one, obviously someone intelligent checking their watch to see who is late and who is on time:

Bbc GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

Who doesn’t love Sherlock?  Just started watching this TV show recently and posted a review on here, too! You can find it by clicking here. Back to punctuality.

Ever since I was a small child, I was fascinated by time. But get this, I never wore a watch. I don’t like things dangling on my arm or wrist… distracting… and then you have something else you need to match to whatever you are wearing (and I’m no good at that)… I digress a lot today. Time is so simple yet so complex.  The second hand clicks around 60 times, then the minute hand moves ever so slightly. Once the minute hand moves around 60 times, the hour hand has moved to the next of the 12 hours on the clock. It could be AM or PM. But so many people have such a hard time with being punctual. Forget DST… that could cause some people a trip to the asylum.

Adventure Time GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

I have no sense of time when it comes to looking at the sun or the sky. I can’t tell what it means to set in the east or west, what shadows are being cast, et al. For me, being punctual is some internal clock that just knows what time it is.

I rarely use an alarm clock. Unless I’m sick or traveling, meaning time change hasn’t settled in quite yet, I wake up at the same time each day (usually about 7am) and start feeling tired about 10pm each night. I can tell throughout the day what time it is usually within 10 to 15 minutes, even if I haven’t looked at a clock in hours. And for those reasons, being punctual has always been innate in me.

It’s a sign that you care enough not to waste someone else’s time. It’s evidence that what you are showing up for is important. It’s considerate (ah…. remember that post!) by showing you took a few minutes to plan your arrival rather than just show up whenever.

Suits GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

It’s not an option for me to be late. I get nervous and uneasy if I’m going to be late for some unavoidable reason. I get frustrated with train or plane delays because it throws off my timely plans. I feel like it says “he didn’t care enough.”

Happy GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

It’s not about counting the minutes or planning to the moment. It’s about ensuring you are not causing any inconvenience to other people. Punctuality helps things run more smoothly. You can often accomplish more as a result.

That said, I’m not 100% punctual. On occasion, if there’s no impact to someone else, I might arrive a little later than planned. For instance… there’s a party from 8 to 11. I tell the host I expect to arrive around 8:30. If I show up at 8:35, I’m not gonna freak out.

Panic GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

But if I am meeting friends for lunch and we say 12… you bet your ass I’ll be there by 11:55. Unless the person I’m meeting is always late… and I have a few friends like that… then, I… well, no… I show up at 11:55.

Some laughs for you about how punctual I’ve been:

  1. Created an itinerary for a 2-week trip to Italy. Arrival times and departure times were noted on a schedule to the minute. I never made that trip, but when I do re-schedule, I’ll be thrown off if I’m not on schedule. And one of those places was the Amalfi Coast where La Dolce Vita is the way of life: you just enjoy the beauty and forget about time. Ha!
  2. I once kept a log of all my times at the gym, noting when it was scheduled and when I actually worked out — each activity, set, rep. Wanted to see if I was using the time the best way possible. NERD!
  3. I’ve timed it so that I walk around the corner for a restaurant reservation so that I could walk right up to the host or hostess at the precise time. Yes, I am a little obsessive.

How about your frequently late arrivals?  What’s the scoop?

 

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Sunday posts, the end of each week, have become a theme on This-Is-My-Truth-Now, often organized by groups of five (5) focused on interesting things about my life. I’m continuing the trend of the seventh day, ending the week on Sunday, as a list (we know I love them) that provides more in depth knowledge about me. Past weeks included:

  • Weeks 1 – 5: Primary ethnicity groups and nationalities
  • Weeks 6 – 10: A to Z Favorites
  • Weeks 11 – 15: Colors with an important meaning
  • Weeks 16 – 20: Cities I’ve lived
  • Weeks 21 – 25: Jobs I’ve held
  • Weeks 26 – 30: Top 10 entertainment options
  • Week 31: How to follow or contact me across all social media platforms
  • Week 32: How to help an artist with promotion
  • Week 33 – 37: Favorite Book Genres
  • Week 38 – 42: Holidays
  • Week 43 – 47: Objects I adore
  • Week 48 – 52: Favorite 365 Moments

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks.

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

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365 Challenge: Day 307 – Instinct

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Instinct: (a) an innate, typically fixed pattern of behavior in animals in response to certain stimuli or (b) what your gut says

instinct

There are moments in life when you tell yourself to push beyond the instinctual behavior that generally guides your actions. Sometimes you can accept a different feeling or approach, but not always — and even when you do, you may not fully engage to see a different result. It is when you reflect back on your decisions and determination that you often see how accurate your instincts can be after they’ve been a natural part of who you are for so very many years. But if you choose to always rely on them, you might not ever experience a necessary revelation.

My instincts have been on high alert in regard to several decisions and trust over the last few months. I remind myself each day to take chances. It might pay off. It might not. If I listened to my instincts today (as in this morning, this moment), and followed through on what they tell me, I might be listening to fear rather than opportunity. I doubt I’ll cater to them right now, as I can see why the voice is louder in the current period — and that’s a good thing. Recognizing the parameters under which you originally developed your instincts is necessary before unequivocally accepting them as concrete guides to evaluating your options and making your decisions.

I’m more vague and philosophical than usual today — it’s something I usually contain in my open words; it’s underdeveloped thoughts, musings of a sensitive soul, a way to ponder what comes next. Nothing’s wrong or bad. It’s simply good to think outside the box (or even forget there is a box, if you recall a post from about two weeks ago) at times… there  should be a balance each day to relying on instinct versus random decisions; we must learn to use it wisely and evolve the process we use to achieve each goal.

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay, an author who lives in NYC. My debut novel, Watching Glass Shatter, can be purchased on Amazon @ http://mybook.to/WGS. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

365 Challenge: Day 245 – Thriller/Suspense (LIST: Fiction Genres )

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Thriller / Suspense: broad genre of literature characterized and defined by the moods they elicit, giving viewers heightened feelings of fear, excitement, surprise, anticipation and anxiety

hriller.jpg

Sundays are LIST days and today is no different. For this group of 5 Sundays, I will pick a favorite book genre and discuss all the reasons why I love it. In our third week, it’s all about books in the suspense and thriller genre. It runs the range from psychological to horror, serial killers to a slow and steady burn that pounces in the end. Let’s chat about why I adore this genre:

  • My life is calm and easy-going; reading about something opposite is always fun
  • I have no issues with hearing about or seeing blood and gore (not sure about reality… not been there, thank you!) in books, TV or film
  • They are always highly creative and imaginative
  • I am not easily scared, so I love the fear factor
  • When it’s psychological, I can really analyze the who/what/when/where/why
  • When a novel has me gripping the pages or the device, almost yelling about what’s about to happen, it is GOOD
  • Sometimes, and this is evil to say (please don’t judge), revenge scenarios in books are pretty cool. Although I try to ignore when anyone does something to hurt/harm me, picturing the person who harmed me as the person being killed in the book helps make it a little easier. (See… I am honest on here!)
  • It’s exciting to feel tension that you know you can put down when finished rather than live in reality afterwards
  • Sometimes it has elements of paranormal, science-fiction or fantasy, which make it just a bit more scary and interesting wondering “could this really happen?”

What are my favorite reads in the last few years?

P.S. These are just a few that I have reviews for, but they are not my only or my all-time faves. I do love Dan Brown, Steig Larson, Patricia Cornwell and Stephen King.

P.P.S. I read & reviewed 3 thriller / suspense novels last month; they are worth checking out and will appear as Author Alerts:  Cleaving Souls, The Author and Search for Maylee

What’s next on my list in this genre?

These are the 3 I’ve committed to reading before 12/31/17

How about you? Any favorites or recommendations? Do you not like this genre? Time to share!

————————————————————-

Sunday posts, the end of each week, have become a theme on This-Is-My-Truth-Now, often organized by groups of five (5) focused on interesting things about my life. I’m continuing the trend of the seventh day, ending the week on Sunday, as a list (we know I love them) that provides more in depth knowledge about me. Past weeks included:

  • Weeks 1 – 5: Primary ethnicity groups and nationalities
  • Weeks 6 – 10: A to Z Favorites
  • Weeks 11 – 15: Colors with an important meaning
  • Weeks 16 – 20: Cities I’ve lived
  • Weeks 21 – 25: Jobs I’ve held
  • Weeks 26 – 30: Top 10 entertainment options
  • Week 31: How to follow or contact me across all social media platforms
  • Week 32: How to help an artist with promotion

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks.

 

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

365 Challenge: Day 234 – Stranger

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Stranger: a person whom one does not know or with whom one is not familiar

ranger.jpg

‘Stranger’ is one of those words that immediately evokes something negative in my mind. We tell children to stay away from people they don’t know. We doubt the honesty of someone we do not recognize. New or weird things encourage fear and nervousness. It’s probably healthy to have a normal level of apprehension over those things that feel strange to us. Where I try to push myself in these areas is to look at how I can convert the negative into the positive whenever I’ve deemed something I interact with as ‘strange.’ It certainly doesn’t work in all cases, e.g. children should always stay far away from people they do not know unless a familiar and friendly adult is also with them. But we should push ourselves to try new things in case we eventually find something we actually like or find a way to become comfortable in a slightly stretched out skin.

In the past, I was uncomfortable meeting new people because I didn’t know what to say or do. I don’t like small talk. I felt awkward figuring out topics. Although I love silence when I’m alone, it’s not a good feeling with someone you don’t know. While I am still a little uncertain at times around others I’ve just met, blogging has taken this fear away in many ways. I no longer worry about what to talk about with a stranger. I have so many new topics and ideas from everyone here, plus my confidence and voice have become stronger. It’s turned into a positive experience now when I meet someone new and find a way to bond or connect, even on something trivial or fleeting.

On the flip side, when I walk down the street, if someone I do not know tries to talk to me, I am immediately uncomfortable. ‘Stranger Danger’ flashes in my mind — and I’m an adult. The world we live in today is a scary place and I always worry that I need to look over my shoulder. Living in NYC in some ways gives you quite a thick skin; you learn to watch for things more acutely as there are more people and very different people around you at all times. Different in terms of attracting every sort of person from all industries, all walks of life and all hopes and dreams. If I lived in a smaller town, I might not worry when a random stranger walked up to me; that’s often considered normal. It’s not the case here, but it’s also something I learn to handle each and every day.

It’s scary when an incident like yesterday’s NYC terrorist attack happened several blocks away from me; it also reminds me to be leery of strangers as much as I am trying to find a way to open up to new people. I also don’t want to put on a mask of fear every time I walk out the door. In the end, I try to find balance in being safe, taking educated risks and keeping my guard up when someone new approaches me. Strangers live all around us. Many are good people. Many are just as afraid of us as we are of them. Sometimes it’s worth taking a chance to get to know the stranger who might end up becoming your friend or confidante.

Credit for today’s 365 Daily Challenge once again goes to Janet for suggesting this word. It took on a different meaning this week for me. Isn’t Janet great?

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay, an author who lives in NYC. My debut novel, Watching Glass Shatter, can be purchased on Amazon @ http://mybook.to/WGS. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

Follow my blog with Bloglovin

365 Challenge: Day 180 – Vulnerable

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Vulnerable: susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm

vulnerable

Being vulnerable is often interpreted as letting yourself be open to something that might hurt you. It’s usually not associated with a positive outcome, leaving us to worry about the consequences of other people’s or even our own actions. It could be that we reveal too much about ourselves or we let emotions control our reactions to those around us. In the end, we feel vulnerable over the entire situation, afraid of letting it ever happen again. Being vulnerable is scary. But sometimes being vulnerable, in a healthy way, can help us grow.

Fear is always going to exist. There will always be bad people who do bad things for bad reasons. Life is not a perfectly run machine; there are accidents, breakdowns and system failures. Sometimes it feels like the right thing to do is avoid risk and stay hidden somewhere no one can reach us. Yet if we remain closed up, unable to share our thoughts and interact with others, we might miss out on a ton of good things still to come. That’s where there the element of surprise can often bring wonderful change, giving us the freedom to control some of the parameters so that we have better balance among our ability to be vulnerable in a good way in front of others.

Today’s 365 Daily Challenge word is ‘vulnerable’ as a reminder that while there are many types of natural and unnatural disasters happening all around us, we can’t let ourselves be afraid to open up to others in a safe and comfortable environment. Look for the areas of life where you can experience beauty and love, by letting yourself be a little bit more receptive to new and sometimes scary ideas. Don’t focus on all the negative things that could bring more harm than necessary. Find a balance where vulnerability is within your power to share in comfortable situations and withhold in uncomfortable ones. It doesn’t have to mean someone is weak or open to attack because they allow themselves a bit of vulnerability. It could be that (s)he will find a positive connection that helps calm and settle everything around them.

It’s OK to say “I can’t do it all” or give yourself permission to make a mistake. People understand when you need to take smaller steps and re-schedule something. You can allow yourself a few moments to breathe without worrying what others will think of you. Being vulnerable in a healthy manner is simply taking care of yourself so that you can recharge and refresh before moving forward with a decision or action. But being vulnerable can also be an opportunity to discover something new about yourself.

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

365 Challenge: Day 56 – A to Z Fears

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A to Z Fears: A list of 26 things that I’m afraid of, one for each letter, a challenge posed to any readers who would like to participate

ATOZfear

As a follow-up to last week’s least favorite things from A to Z, this week we’re focusing on things we are afraid of, continuing the trend of the seventh day, ending the week on Sunday, as a list (we know I love them) of sorts that provides more in depth knowledge about me.

Rules

  1. Pick something that starts with that letter and add it to your own list. Don’t think about it… just come up with a couple ideas in under five seconds and choose the best of the bunch.
  2. It can be a thing or place, but not a named person. We don’t want anyone to feel left out!
  3. This week it’s your biggest fears… but next week will be something else. Add in any extra comments if you need to explain.
  4. Nominate 5 to 10 people at the bottom of your post that you want to re-post with their 26 items. Pick at random – no favorites!
  5. It’s a fun game, but if you are nominated and DO NOT want to participate, you don’t have to. Just ignore it! Totally OK.
  6. You may not have been nominated, but you can totally participate by following these rules.
  7. Post it as a reply on the person’s blog where you found it. Also post it on your own blog as a new post.
  8. Should we use a tag so we can see all the responses? Suggestions… AtoZFear
  9. This may not go anywhere if there is no participation other than me. And that’s OK. The 365 Daily Challenge was about me to start, so I cannot expect or force anyone else.
  10. Have fun and get to know your online friends. Tell us when you post your 26 items.  Thanks!

A to Z Things I Fear

A – Alligators

B – Bats

C – Crocodiles

D – Death

E – Eerie sounds

F – Farting in public (Eww… that’s why I NEVER do it.)

G – Getting goosed (double points for me!)

H – Headless Things

I – Illness

J – Jersey Shore reality stars (my living nightmare)

K – Kidney stones

L – Lord Voldemort

M – Murder

N – Nuclear bombs

O – Open wounds getting infected

P – Paralysis

Q – Quandary, as in being in one

R – Ricocheted things coming back to hit me

S – Spiders

T – Tarantulas

U – Unidentifiable substances

V – Violence

W – Wet things (especially when I don’t know why it’s wet)

X – Xenophobics (their fear makes me fear for the world)

Y – Yacking (throwing up) in front of people

Z – Zits

People You Are Tagging

  1. iamdes
  2. iamthatgirl23
  3. bookishendeavors
  4. mistysbookspace
  5. sarahylockwood
  6. PatriciaFairweatherRomero
  7. Nel
  8. kathyscottage
  9. theorangutanlibrarian
  10. bettylouise31

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post.

365 Challenge: Day 54 – Nervous

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Nervous: easily agitated or alarmed; tending to be anxious; highly strung

If you are confident in every moment of your life, perhaps you are not challenging yourself enough to step out of your comfort zone. To be nervous is to express emotions that demonstrate you are uncertain, worried, fearful, concerned… and if kept at a proper level, it’s actually a good thing. It’s healthy to release total control sometimes… allowing your mind to cleanse, heal and prep for the next battle.

I’ve often thought that people who are totally comfortable in any situation are suspicious. Not because they’ve done something wrong, but I wonder what’s going on their head. Have they learned everything technique to keep calm? Do they have weak goals and objectives such that they will always meet or exceed them? Do they not push themselves to try new activities? Or are they just that good where they have no nerves to control?

On the scale of nerves, I fall somewhere in the middle, probably like most of us. I have several things I’m afraid of (that’s a post coming up soon!), but I’ve also a few where I’m completely comfortable and in my element, even though most others would be freaking out.

What makes me nervous?

  • Waiting for responses, answers, results
  • Delivering bad or disappointing news to someone else
  • People staring at me
  • Being in crowded places

What doesn’t make me nervous?

  • Confessing so much about myself in this 365 Daily Challenge
  • Public Speaking
  • Being completely cut off from any form of communication, e.g. deserted island
  • Being idle

We each have our own goals in mind, our purpose or objective for living (sometimes we actually haven’t yet figured it out). We generally know our comfort zones and stay within a small percentage of testing the waters just beyond. Some people’s boundaries feel limitless. Others feel constraining. It’s what makes us all different, able to survive and open to change.

Being nervous shows you are considering something different, something new. Sometimes we can be nervous about the exact same thing over-and-over again, but in most instances, the more you confront the issue, the less it will cause distress. Not always of course, but then again, I’m not focusing on the huge life-altering things… just the daily goings-on of life around us.

When I’m nervous, I tend to either hide or bark… not like a dog (wouldn’t that be amusing), but as in become a bit mean or aggressive. My responses will be short and it comes across like I’m snapping at someone — often the person who is trying to help me. It’s a natural reaction, I do realize it. Perhaps because we feel comfortable around that person, it’s easier to relax our mind over the things we are nervous about.

Rather than discuss the tools and techniques to calm us down, I’m more apt to question why we are nervous. I prefer getting to the root or source of the problem. And not necessarily by going to other people, but by thinking over the situation in my own head. There are absolutely times when you need someone else’s help, but there are also times when you just need some uninterrupted time for yourself to ponder.

Let’s take my nerves over delivering bad news… I believe it’s because I don’t want to hurt someone. I feel ill-equipped to fix his/her pain. I fear retaliation or losing the friendship. But when you push deeper… think about where you fit in with the overall issue that you need to cover. Consider what happens if you don’t confront / discuss it. Picture the end game when the situation is resolved. Focus on where you want to end up rather than what’s happened in the past to initiate the delivery of the bad news. It’s also important to outline the goals of the conversation. Don’t wing it. Have the beginning, middle and end worked out. Consider the paths the conversation could take. Have some positive things in your back pocket. Work through it enough on your own, or even with someone else, until you feel prepared to address the situation.

Your nerves won’t go away. And that’s a good thing. You want your nerves to be on a bit of an alert — not a high one — but enough so you retain your humanity when bringing up difficult topics. It’s worked for me on some occasions, but I don’t always practice it. Sometimes… I’m just scared shitless (yes, I said that aloud… but you know the rules… once I type it here, the only changes I can make are to grammar and spelling)… and I am a Nervous Nelly. Or is it Nellie? Let’s free-form away from this discussion… where did that saying come from? I need to go look it up. And I think that’s a wrap… or is it rap?  Another thing to look up. Yikes, I’m a little nervous I’ve made a fool of myself with this conclusion today. Ciao.

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.