party

365 Challenge: Day 359 – Hoopla (LIST: Favorite 365 Moments)

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Hoopla: excitement surrounding an event or situation, especially when considered to be unnecessary fuss

1st Sunday list of 5 favorite moments (4)

Sundays are LIST days and today is no different — except it is because this is the last LIST word. Since this group of five Sundays is the final group and the conclusion of the 365 Daily Challenge, I decided to select my five favorite moments throughout the last year of this challenge. This is our fifth and final week, and I’ve gone with hoopla because it’s time to throw a little celebration for all the mentors who have helped, but also because it’s now my turn to give back again. I DO want to make a fuss about it!

As another big clue and hint about the future of the This Is My Truth Now blog, the word mentor is very important. A new segment beginning in a couple of weeks will focus on helping people reading my blog as I will be sharing lots of information about my favorite profession and job… think of it as a tools of the trade approach… to being a mentor for anyone starting out fresh or new, or who wants to learn different approaches to something they’ve been doing their own way for a while. If I say anymore, I’d be giving it away… but if you’ve read my profession list, you will easily figure out which one I plan to make front and center on the new blog!

***

365 Challenge: Day 43 – Mentor

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Mentor: an experienced and trusted adviser, to advise or train someone

A few interesting thoughts occurred to me as I sat to draft today’s 365 Daily Challenge. One, I awoke thinking about something entirely different from the daily characteristic. Two, how many traits are there to describe oneself without being redundant, repetitive or superfluous. Ha, aren’t I funny?

Three, it doesn’t have to always be a characteristic, i.e. it could be a noun that offers certain images or feelings which I’m ultimately trying to represent. And so today, I will veer a little bit and offer up a word that means a lot to me. And perhaps it will be a useful mechanism in the future for these daily posts. I have at least a dozen other traits in mind, but some I’m saving for a certain day or time period.

Back to the word “mentor.” I wrote a post about being a mentor on my professional website where I keep pertinent information for anyone who may stumble upon me and consider me for a consulting position. It very much applies to today’s post. That said, in this post, I will try not to duplicate what I’ve already noted, but instead indicate why being a mentor is something I already am on some levels, as well as something I would like to expand and showcase in the future.

What I admire about a mentor is his/her genuine interest in sharing the knowledge gained to those in an inner circle. To me, there is a difference between a mentor and a coach, friend, adviser, boss, et al. A mentor, usually long-term, is (1) someone who has amassed an expansive amount of knowledge and experience in certain areas that demonstrate (s)he is qualified to be a mentor and (2) someone who develops intimate relationships and bonds with the individuals being mentored above and beyond a brief exchange of advice.

A mentor is someone you can talk to who has a well-rounded amount of knowledge about you, too. I wouldn’t classify it a mentor relationship when you’re reading someone’s books or attending their seminar to improve your own skills. It’s not having a conversation with your boss about the next step in your career. It’s not feedback from a more established writer to help you get your focus back on a specific chapter or task when they don’t know anything about your work. It’s about continuous conversation, outside of normal “work-related” activities, where you engage in introspective and enlightening discussions about the topic you are being mentored in and decide on a path together, that seems logical, and focused on your future.

An adviser can tell you about things you need to consider for next steps, but that seems more temporary to me. What I like about the mentor relationship is that it seems more permanent. Sometimes life-long, sometimes only a few years; it all depends on circumstances, need and location. The key is a solid foundation, commitment and depth of connection between the two people involved. Both need to want it to work and not in a fleeting manner. It’s picking up a phone and talking about where you are today and where you want to be in 3 months, 3 years or 3 decades. And then reflecting in that future period how it turned out.

I’ve been privileged to have two true mentors in my lifetime thus far. Both came through my professional career in technology. I still consider myself friends with both, even though our lives are more separate now. I often pick up the phone and chat when I want to discuss something important about me, my choices, my decisions, my options, et al. It’s not like calling a friend and asking for advice, although we also do have that kind of a relationship. But when the format is as a mentor, it’s very clear and distinct from casual friendly conversation about “how was the trip,” “what’s new with the family,” “did you see that play?”

I hope to be a mentor one day. I’ve had the beginnings of this develop with a few people, but not enough that I would call myself a true mentor – yet! I’m on that road tho, as it is part of a cycle where I’ve been blessed with the relationship and want to give back in the same way. It also makes me feel better than most anything else in normal, every day life. To know that I can share common thoughts, goals and dreams with someone else, watch the growth and changes, and see the end results is a very rewarding experience.

NO – NOT LIKE THIS EXAMPLE!!!

I read a post last week about being a mentor, and it reminded me I haven’t been focusing on this as much as I should be. Thank you to that blogger (you know who you are if you are reading this!) for the reminder. You’ve put a spindle back up on the stairway guiding me on this journey. And what I should be focusing on is finding a mentor to help me with deciding my next steps as well as ensuring those around me know I’m open to helping someone else in the same way. Now to figure out what it is I’d be good at…

And while I’m working on both of those options… how about you? Any good examples of a mentor relationship you’d like to share?  How does it make you feel when you’ve been successful? Or even when you haven’t been?

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Sunday posts, the end of each week, have become a theme on This-Is-My-Truth-Now, often organized by groups of five (5) focused on interesting things about my life. I’m continuing the trend of the seventh day, ending the week on Sunday, as a list (we know I love them) that provides more in depth knowledge about me. Past weeks included:

  • Weeks 1 – 5: Primary ethnicity groups and nationalities
  • Weeks 6 – 10: A to Z Favorites
  • Weeks 11 – 15: Colors with an important meaning
  • Weeks 16 – 20: Cities I’ve lived
  • Weeks 21 – 25: Jobs I’ve held
  • Weeks 26 – 30: Top 10 entertainment options
  • Week 31: How to follow or contact me across all social media platforms
  • Week 32: How to help an artist with promotion
  • Week 33 – 37: Favorite Book Genres
  • Week 38 – 42: Holidays
  • Week 43 – 47: Objects I adore
  • Week 48 – 52: Favorite 365 Moments

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks.

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TAG: I’m a Rock Star

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Many thanks to Claire @ BrizzleLass Books for tagging me on this cool tag. She chose to torture me with this one, as I have no musical talent whatsoever, which means my answers will be an epic failure. But I don’t back away from challenges, so all I can say is… if you are reading this, as a favor, please torture Claire with tons of new follows that cause her hours of time learning about and meeting new people. 🙂  ‘Cause she deserves it for being a… really cool friend from the UK who I seem to share a lot in common with!

 

 

What is the name of your band, or if you are a solo artist, your stage name (example: Lady Ga Ga, Snoop Dog, Puddles the Clown, etc…)?

 

  • Duality of Conflict, as I am two people inside of one, trying to merge them into someone sane that others find interesting and amusing. Is it working? La La La, La La LAAAAA

 

What genre or style of music are you known for?

  • Nothing. I am quite eclectic in my music taste. In a matter of 30 minutes, I’ll listen to Dolly Parton’s Hard Candy Christmas, Lady Gaga’s Alejandro, Chicago, Usher, Pink, Les Mis, and Snoop Dogg. I tend to listen to lots of varied artists!

 

What instrument do you play or are you the lead singer?

  • I play this really cool instrument called silence. I am amazing at this particular one. Very few people can play it as well as I can. So much so, I’m actually famous for being able to play silence better than anyone. Let’s test that out right now. 3, 2, 1…

<< Oh, are you still there? This is me playing my instrument…. La La La, La La La… >>

If you could be the opening act for any band currently touring who would it be?

  • Hmmm… I’d like to meet Adam Levine from Maroon 5, so I suppose that would be a good opportunity. Who wouldn’t? There’s nothing wrong in the picture below. The open shirt. The tattoos. The facial hair. The chain. The low-slung jeans. The flawless skin. The ripples. The dark expression. Oh… I can’t. Just can’t.

levine.jpg

I mean seriously… I have to stop looking at this right now so I can finish the post.

Who would you name as your musical inspiration? This person can be currently breathing, or not.

  • I am tone deaf, so I have a feeling anyone I chose would sound offensive. I’ll bow out of this question and say “Isn’t (s)he so cool?”

What special item do you ask for in your dressing room on a tour contract rider?

  • Air conditioning. Everywhere. Even if the temperature is under 60 degrees. Being cold is better than hot anytime!

 

What item from home do you pack in your suitcase to take on tour?

  • Laptop. Must be able to write. And I’ll follow Claire’s lead and select a second item: Dark Chocolate. I’ll do anything for it. ANYTHING. Do you hear me, Adam?

 

choco.jpg

What does your stage attire look like?

  • If I had to answer this question honestly… if that were my profession… I’d be in the gym a bit more… and I’d be shirtless and in a pair of gym shorts. No shoes. Totally comfy and relaxed. Just chillin’ on stage as though the entire world was having fun. Except me, cause I’d be singing, and I can’t do that, so bad that people run.

What backstage nickname have the roadies given you based on your personality?

  • Mystery Man

 

Every successful rockstar has a special charity. What’s yours?

  • Pet Care — want to take care of them all!

 

What is the title of your memoir going to be?

  • No One Ever Knew (he was so awesome)

 

Note: I’m being funny here. I really do not have an ego at all.

Nominations

I have nominated thee below but this isn’t book related and I haven’t a clue if all of you are into music so please don’t feel obligated!

  1. https://www.asimplyenchantedlife.com/abiding-mercy/
  2. https://aspentreesbookreviews.wordpress.com/2017/05/20/small-great-things-by-jodi-picoult/
  3. https://bookfiendsite.wordpress.com/2017/07/30/weekly-wrap-up-july-24th-30th/
  4. https://bobosbookbank.com/2017/02/01/read-again-e-shelf/
  5. https://valeriesmusings.com/2017/07/25/blog-tour-killer-party-review/

 

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.

365 Challenge: Day 87 – Dancer

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Dancer: a person who dances or whose profession is dancing [to move rhythmically to music, typically following a set sequence of steps]

dancer.jpg

In yesterday’s post, I hinted that I’d blog about being a dancer at some point in the future. Well that day is today, for a few reasons: (1) I spent 8 hours cleaning the apartment, grocery shopping, running errands and doing the laundry — my brain cannot think anymore, so this was the first word to come to mind, (2) If I don’t do it now, I’ll forget and (3) I still have Dirty Dancing on my mind from over the weekend….

And you correctly guessed, that picture above is… not me. Nor is my professional, hobby or exercise routine that of a dancer. So why you ask, am I blogging about a dancer? It’s simple. I sorta-kinda-wanna be a dancer — in a totally re-invented-different-universe-way. I don’t want to do it now in this life… it’s too late, but I think I would have been a really good if I had started as a child.

I have no idea what kind of a dancer I’d be. I’ve never once — not a single day — taken a class or lessons in dancing, nor have I been to many ballet or other dance performances. My interest in dancing is really just this kinda fun thing I would like to do. A little bit of history… and probably way more than I should reveal at this point, as you will see a very different and shameful proud side of me.

Prior to going away to college, I thought fraternities and sororities were awful things. I said I would never be friends with anyone who was in one either. Fast-forward a little bit. Fresh year, fall semester… away in school in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. I am feeling a little out-of-my-element being far away from home, not quite making a lot of friends at that point. For some lucky reason, I won the room lottery and got a single dorm room, so I didn’t even have a roommate to latch on to. I had a few friends that were girls, and they took me to a party at a sorority house, where they thought they might pledge in the spring semester. While there, I met some fraternity brothers who actually seemed kinda cool and they convinced me to come check them out in the spring semester when I returned to campus after the holidays. So… I did. But first, I went to a sorority formal early that spring with one of the girls I mentioned earlier.

So… another thing I should have mentioned. I rarely drank before I went away to college. Not only was I under 21, but I just wasn’t friends with any frequently drinking chums. When I started going to these parties, I would taste a little bit of someone’s drink each time. I still wouldn’t have a whole drink. I wasn’t a goody-two-shoes, but I wasn’t keen on doing something when I still didn’t feel like I had close enough friends I could trust to watch out for me. Fast-forward to the sorority formal… I had several drinks and got extremely wasted for the first time in my life. It just happened that at least 20 of my soon-to-be fraternity brothers were there too, as they dated a lot of the girls in the sorority. My big brother in the fraternity was struggling with choosing a Pledge Name for me, as part of the period before you become an official member. Well… I got my name that night.

You see… I’ve had a good reason for not drinking in the past. Apparently, another personality comes out. Someone I had never met in my first 18 years. His name was Wild Boy. I have no memory or recollection of this particular event, except for a few pictures which make me remember getting very very sick that night. It seems… whenever a song that I liked came on, I danced in the middle of the floor in front of everyone — Mr. Quiet & Shy — and whatever the words in the song were, I sang them loudly and also tried to mimic the actions on the dance floor. The song that put everyone over the edge and gave me my fraternity Pledge Name was KC & The Sunshine Band’s “Get Down Tonight.” And when that 3-line chorus repeated itself, so did I:  “Do a Little Dance, Make a Little Love, Get Down Tonight.”

And I did a little dance… I made out like a little — no better word — slut, and when the third line came on, I dropped to the floor and tried to break-dance, but I was so drunk, I kept falling over. Hence…  my fraternity name became “Saturday Night Fever.”

*** Pause for laughter… go ahead… I have no shame and I told you of my own free will and volition. ***

Years later, brothers still text and call me, asking for Saturday Night Fever. It’s probably the single most embarrassing moment of my life, and I’m so glad I truly don’t remember it happening. I just suffer through everyone else’s memories. But my friends… the story doesn’t end there. As I said earlier, when I drink a lot… I want to dance a lot. Another time, which I have a very vivid memory of… was going to my first NYC club after I officially “came out.” I was 25 years old. I was single. And I went out with a group of new friends who just liked to party every weekend. Within an hour, I had 3 or 4 drinks and I was quite relaxed. No inhibitions. Lindsay Lohan was a popular singer back then, you see… before all the crazy jail stuff. The song “Rumors” came on… and somehow, I made my way up to the stage. Front and Center. Standing on a box. I just started dancing in front of a huge crowd. And after a little while… the shirt came off… and I completely let loose, dancing and grinding and whatever else felt like the thing to do at that moment. There’s a dancer in me trying to make his way out… bursting with awesome moves and a sync’d rhythm with the music.

And the last little bit of evidence… taking my shirt off in public is not a one-time occurrence. I have several incidents / occasions / memories / WTF-moments where when the music is right, I somehow get myself into situations where I take some of my clothes off and start dancing… and on two occasions, there were bills stuffed in my pants. Hence why I kinda love the Magic Mike movies. Part of me wanted to be a stripper, I think. I find it very intriguing… not that I’d ever be able to do it while sober or around people I know well. These things have all happened at times or in places where I was either drunk or mostly a stranger to those around me. And I did my best to keep this post clean, as I have friends reading it, who don’t need to look at me funny the next time we see one another.

I also think it would be cool to know how to dance normal everyday routines at weddings, cocktail parties, New Year’s Eve, etc. It’s not all about the “dirty dancing” with me… I am still that nice, good and quiet guy. It’s just every so often, the devil comes out and you either want to run far away, or if you like that kinda stuff and want to see the crazy side of me, then let’s go out to a NYC club. It’s been a few years for me. But give me at least 4 weeks of notice, so I can put in a little more time at the gym and a little less sugar in my diet!

And seriously… for someone who constantly says he is shy, I have no idea where this part of me comes from… where it hides… or why I am always both extremes of a personality trait! What about you? Any professional dancers out there? Strip-Teasers? Ball-Room aficionados? Great bar dancers? Only when you drink? Any time there’s music? Please don’t leave me hanging out here alone… although a secret part of me sorta likes knowing the bad boy is still hiding in there somewhere.

About Me & the “365 Daily Challenge”

I’m Jay and I live in NYC. By profession, I work in technology. By passion, I work in writing. I’ve always been a reader. And now I’m a daily blogger. I decided to start my own version of the “365 Daily Challenge” where since March 13, 2017, I’ve posted a characteristic either I currently embody or one I’d like to embody in the future. 365 days of reflection to discover who I am and what I want out of life.

The goal: Knowledge. Acceptance. Understanding. Optimization. Happiness. Help. For myself. For others. And if all else fails, humor. When I’m finished in one year, I hope to have more answers about the future and what I will do with the remainder of my life. All aspects to be considered. It’s not just about a career, hobbies, residence, activities, efforts, et al. It’s meant to be a comprehensive study and reflection from an ordinary man. Not a doctor. Not a therapist. Not a friend. Not an encyclopedia full of prior research. Just pure thought, a blogged journal with true honesty.

Join the fun and read a new post each day, or check out my book reviews, TV/Film reviews or favorite vacation spots. And feel free to like, rate, comment or take the poll for each post. Note: All written content is my original creation and copyrighted to me, but the graphics and images were linked from other sites and belong to them. Many thanks to their original creators.